If you are just starting to seriously consider adopting a child, you could be in for a lot of surprises. You may have been told (or read) about certain pieces of information that are actually not true. If you adopt a child, you are giving that child an opportunity to have a loving family and a real chance at succeeding in life. This applies to adoptions in Florida and across the country.
Some misconceptions you should put away right away include the following:
- The adoptive parents are not the child’s real parents: Just because biology didn’t play a role in the relationship that the family has with the adopted child doesn’t mean that the parents are not the child’s parents. Families run much deeper than DNA. In reality, the real mother and father are the people who raise the child, nurture the child, clothe and feed the child and are there for the child’s important moments.
- The adopted child doesn’t fit into the family: The adopted child fits in exactly like the biological child fits in. However, sometimes, there are moments when any one of the children is slightly off and they don’t fit in. That usually has less to do with biology than it does with children being children.
- Children are put up for adoption because they are unwanted: Although there are many different reasons why a child is put up for adoption, not wanting them is probably the furthest from the truth. In most cases, having to live without the child is incredibly painful and many mothers feel that a huge part of them is being ripped away. In fact, many mothers who give up their children do so because they love them so much and want them to have a better life than what they can give to them.
- Adoptive parents should be worried that the birth parents will want the child back: Adoption should be taken seriously by everyone: the adoptive parents and the birth parents. This is the child’s life we are talking about. Although adoption is an extremely emotional experience, it is usually the right decision. In many cases, there is transparency and open communication between the adoptive parents and the birth parents and that is healthy for everyone concerned. It is a good way to go in many instances.
- Open adoption confuses the child: In general, that is not the case. In fact, it usually instills positive feelings and a sense of security in the child. Another really positive aspect of an open adoption is that it gives the child information on the medical history in their biological family, which may prove to be invaluable at some point. It may also add another dimension to the child’s life and that child may very well experience the joy of an extended family.
- Adoption is very costly: In some cases, adoption can be costly. However, that is not always the case. Many people end up adopting a child who was in a foster home. In that situation, adoption fees are much more reasonable.
- Adopted children are emotionally troubled: That is no more true than biological children being emotionally troubled. If the adoptive parents create a positive, open atmosphere regarding the adoption, the child will be adjusted, accepting and happy. It all depends on how the information is presented.
- The birth mother will never be able to see her baby again after giving birth: This is not necessarily true. It depends on what type of adoption is used. If it is an open adoption, the birth mother can spend time with the child, if everyone is in agreement. The birth mother (or parents) would need to make an arrangement with the adoptive parents for a visitation schedule.
- Adoption is time-sensitive: That is definitely a myth. There is no wrong time to choose adoption for the baby. There are many people who can help and who can offer valuable support. Also, there are many different adoption options from which to choose.
There is joy in adoption
Adoption should be a positive experience for the adoptive family and hopefully for the birth family as well. However, with that being said, the process can sometimes be complicated and take longer than expected. That is why having the support that you need can make things go smoothly. What is most important is to do what is best for the child and to give that child a loving home and a loving family.